Oprah – The Ultimate Hobby Farmer

So, you’re a successful talk show host that has spent your life and made millions by sharing with the world your warped views, half-truths, and petty lies. So, what are you going to do when you retire?

Naturally, jump on the farming bandwagon.

But, of course, because you’re an enlightened celebrity, you’re going to do it the right way; the hobby farmer way. Except your hobby farm will have the advantage of all those millions of dollars you raked in from doing absolutely no work your entire life.

Oprah: The New Hobby Farmer?

Let me first start out by saying that Oprah was never a fan of real farming. She had a person from the Humane Farming Association on her show blasting animal agriculture. Apparently, that was part of a larger episode highlighting just how evil our animal farmers are. Her magazine also posts articles about just how unsound and bad GM crops are (which, as any loyal reader knows, is a bunch of hooey). So, Oprah likes to attack farmers. Fine.

Of course when she opened her farm in Hawaii, she made it organic. Her idea was to have a “locally grown” farm on Hawaii where she can produce all the food one might need or want on the island and give it to all the natives. Well, I guess as long as all that food fits onto one acres (although, to be fair, she could expand up to 16 acres).(Source: FFF)

Oprah turned to her buddy Bob Green, “an exercise physiologist and personal trainer whom Winfrey first consulted in the early 1990s about weight loss,” for help. (Source: NPR) Look, I don’t know about you, but I’m not sure Oprah’s nutritionist is who I would go to for advice on healthy eating.

Nonetheless, Oprah’s bounty is apparently fruitful and she’s been giving away the produce for free: “the cool thing is that she’s just straight up giving away the crops so far, which is about 145 pounds a week from just ONE ACRE! They’re going to restaurants and charities for FREE!” (Source: Perez Hilton)

Gee, I wish all farmers weren’t so greedy and they would give away crops for free! I mean, seriously, those farmers trying to make a profit are so gosh darn evil! Oprah should be made a saint!!

Ok, seriously. That’s cute that Oprah wants to use her millions of dollars, start a farm that isn’t profitable and give away all the food she produces. But that isn’t the real world. There aren’t enough celebrity “farmers” who are going to feed the world’s population. Quite frankly, she’s being ridiculous. Out here in reality, we have to make a living. We have to feed, clothe, and shelter our families from our farm income. We didn’t just sit on tv and talk and get paid millions before coming out here. Instead of demeaning our way of life with her celebrity status, she should be thanking us and showing a little respect.

And since organic cannot produce enough food to actually feed the world’s population (hello, starvation), it’s incredibly hypocritical of Oprah to start an organic farm to feed those who aren’t getting enough to eat. How insulting. By wasting her 16 acres of food, she’s actually promoting hungry people.

Some might think what she’s doing is wonderful, but I don’t. Nope, she’s a typical hobby farmer: leaves Chicago, buys a little bit of land, and wants to show all the good ol’ boys how to do it.

Please, spare us.